Listening to right now- Silver and Cold by AFI


A few years ago I met a girl. I call her Matanda. I admired her so much because she was so fun , outgoing, and just all around awesome. I still think the same. But one thing that struck me interesting about her was how emotionally strong she was, or seemed. She is my good friend and hopefully will remain so.

A month ago I was on the phone with a friend. She was saying somethings that made me very sad. At the end of our conversation my friend said to me that it didn't sound like I was crying. Apparently she was expecting me to cry. Truth be told, and despite myself, I was bawling.

All this to say that we all can fool everyone with our demeanor. Although everyone likes to think or make others think they're strong, none of us really are. The bad thing about being so seemingly strong is that your or other people will hurt you intentionally or unintentionally but you will think that they're so strong, but chances are- they're not.

Why did I tell you all that? I have no idea why, but it's been bugging me lately how I can seem strong to some but in reality I'm not that strong, but I'm working on it.


Listening to right now- Starts with One by Shiny Toy Guns